|
|
Post by theman on Dec 9, 2007 22:14:14 GMT -5
Man smiles.
[glow=purple,2,300]Mr. Kincaid I presume?[/glow]
Man slides his head over to the right.
[glow=purple,2,300]Jacob I presume?[/glow]
Jacob and Cameron look at each other, and then back at Man.
[glow=purple,2,300]THE MAN believes that you ordered...........[/glow]
Man opens up the Large Pizza with everything on it.
[glow=purple,2,300]The large pizza with everything on it?[/glow]
Cameron has a shocked look on his face as he back at Jacob who is also shocked. Cameron looks back at The Man and nods.
[glow=purple,2,300]Thats what The Man thought.[/glow]
The Man with the pizza box still open SHOVES it into Cameron's face and all 3 men fall down in the doorway of the house.
[glow=purple,2,300]FUCKER THAT IS WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH THE MAN.[/glow]
|
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Kincaid on Dec 9, 2007 22:42:39 GMT -5
Stumbling to the ground, pizza flying everywhere in the doorway of the house, Cameron finds himself almost crashing against the floor next to Jacob. Both of them almost immediately began scraping the toppings off of their faces and clothes as Cam slowly begins to get back to his feet, just as "the Man" starts to do the same. Seconds later he finds himself standing in an upright position again, his hands held out in front of him as if in disbelief before taking his index finger, running it down the side of his face starting at his temple, all the way down to his chin, before looking at the accumulated pizza remains now cluttered on his hand. He looks to the "Man"...Then back to Jacob who was still in shock as well. Turning back to the man, a smile slowly begins to form on his face as he raises that same index finger up towards the "Man"...
"Alright...Alright Puff Daddy. Stay RIGHT there...I got something. I got something for your Making the Band ass. Yea..."
He turns making his way down the hallway and towards the kitchen area walking with a purpose almost. He storms in a bee line straight past the couch where 'Nando's punk ass was just sitting there laughing like a freakin' Crystal Meth junkie, right into the kitchen area where he headed straight for the fridge. Right off he bends down, and immediately starts rambling through the fridge looking for something. He finds himself tossing things back and forth, all over the fridge and onto the kitchen floor with no regards for the mess he was making.
Suddenly a HUGE smile came over his face, finally seeing just what he was searching for. He reached for it, taking the bowl covered with plastic wrap into his hand, and quickly turned making his way back out of the kitchen and back towards the front door at a fast pace.
Within almost seconds of entering the living room area again, he was only a few feet from the "Man" again, Jacob already smiling from ear to ear when he saw the bowl in Cam's hands. Cam stopped short, raising his opposite hand and wiping away a bit more of the pizza from his face before speaking up...
"You little childish bitch. You wanna come over here to someone's house you don't even freakin' know...Pretend to be a pizza delivery boy, which mind you, you probably are a few dozen IQ points away from even being qualified for, and toss a damn pizza...At me and my friends huh...
"....."
"Hell what kind of man would I be if I didn't play along right?...So what we have here is..."
He quickly whips the plastic wrap from the bowl, revealing an...Eerie stench swiftly filling the room as he continues on. Jacob had already covered his nose and began shaking his head back and forth knowing where it all was going. Cam holds the bowl up and continues on..
"Some of the best, mexican made Chilli this side of the border my friend. Thanks to my good buddy over there 'Nando. 'Twas pretty good too I gotta say. EIGHT WEEKS AGO WHEN HE MADE IT!...Yea...Exactly. See we're so lazy around here, we never cleaned out the fridge and ahhh...Let's just say, after a while we were all scared to even touch it because we thought something was moving inside of it..."
"Actually...I think it still is. I don't know...Maybe you can tell ME!"
And without any notice, Cam sent the bowl flying towards the "Man's" face, splattering the 2 month old chilli all over his face, almost forcing them both to the ground once again. Almost before he could feel the impact of the floor, Cam was finding his way back to his feet with a bit of support from his parter Jacob, pulling him back away from the fallen "pizza delivery boy" while laughing at the smell of the chilli now plastered all over his face and clothes. He could only glare downward at him smiling as he responded...
"Who's the "Man" now bitch? Look at you...Looks like someone took a crap all over you. Get up and get out of here before I call the cops. You know you probably got like a hundred warrants for your arrest or something. Come on, go. The nights still young so you still got time to go sell narcotics I'm sure. " |
|
|
|
Post by dj on Dec 9, 2007 23:05:12 GMT -5
DJ had been drinking all night, and just passed out in some bathroom. He had no idea where he was when he woke up, but he sure as hell spotted that bottle of Jack on that bathroom sink, and begun chuggin that bitch. This was no little bottle either. It was one of the largest bottles they sold. Cant think of the size at the moment though  . But anyway, he looked in the mirror after emptying the contents of the bottle, and all he could see was two of himself. He then stumbled out of the door, and began to make his way down the hall, really just sliding down the wall to keep his balance.
Once he reaches the living room, he spots several people..not 4...but eight of them bastards. What...the...fuck...is...that...rotten...smell? All of a sudden, his thoughts change.....GET OUTTA MAH HOUSE!!!This bitch was drunk still. Sumbitch needs to get that taken care of for real. He begins walking again...only this time he didnt have a wall to hold onto, and he made it as far as the couch...fallin to the ground as he got in front of it...right at Nandos feet, passing out again. |
|
|
|
Post by theman on Dec 10, 2007 11:40:52 GMT -5
The Man sits up and is in total shock as he screams.
[glow=purple,2,300]OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU SON OF A BITCH ASSHOLE FUCK SHIT DAMN PISS ALL OVER 2PACS ASS.[/glow]
Man gets up but he can't see as the Chili covers his face. He stumbles over and knocks down Jacob again. Man rubs his face on the carpet and gets most of it off. Man stands up and looks at Cameron and points.
[glow=purple,2,300]YOU MOTHER FUCKER.[/glow]
Man runs after Cameron and tackles him down to the ground. Man begins to throw some punches as Jacob gets up and pulls him off. The cops then show up and raise hell.
PUT YOUR HANDS ON THE GROUND. ALL OF YOU NOWWWWWWW.
Jacob lets go of Man and gets on his knees.
[glow=purple,2,300]Wait what?[/glow]
PUT YOUR HANDS ON THE GROUND SIR.
[glow=purple,2,300]NOOOOOOOOOOO THIS DOES NOT INVOLVE THE LOCAL AUTHORITIES ASSHOLE. GET LOSTTTTTTTT.[/glow]
PUT YOU GOD DAMN HANDS ON THE GROUND NOWWWWWWWWWW.
[glow=purple,2,300]FUCK YOU.[/glow]
One of the cops then runs at Man and tackles him to the ground and force the cuffs on him. About ten minutes later you see all of the men lined up against the cop cars. Man, Cameron, Jacob, Fernando, and Dustin who is lieing on the ground with cuffs on.
Hello fellas, I am Officer Mitchell, and I would REALLY like to know what in the hell is going on here.
None of the men say a word.
Is anyone going to speak?
[glow=purple,2,300]Well, it all started when this here son of bitch decided to pull a prank on me by calling me and PRETENDING he wanted dominoes fucking pizza. Then he......[/glow]
Cameron interrupts.
|
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Kincaid on Dec 10, 2007 12:03:59 GMT -5
"Bull SHIT! This dude is lying officer. We were merely sitting here having a nice and quiet bible study session..."
"...."
"Yea and ahhh...This guy here just ran up to your door, kicked it open waving a pistol and screaming about how we better help him sell crack to some of the elementary kids down the street. I was shocked officer. I've never ever seen anything lik..."
"I saw the WHOLE thing officer! I can tell you what you wanna know!"
Cam and the others turn their attention to the house next door, seeing his neighbor Miss Robinson, all wrinkled up like a damn ruffles chip walking across the lawn with a robe on as if it was morning or something. Probably stinking of booze and some ass crack showing plumber she just banged for some free service. Shaking his head and knowing exactly how she was once she started running her mouth he interrupts her...
"Miss Robinson get your ass back into the house! No one wants to hear what you gotta say. Just go back inside and..."
"Oh no I won't either. No. Officer those two boys and that little mexican have done nothing but bring this neighborhood down since they showed up here a few weeks ago. Damn beer bottles all over the place, hookers leaving their house all times of the day and..."
"Oh shut it up Miss Robinson! You're just pissed because your husband came over to bang some prostitutes and left you at home alone wondering how many razors you'd break trying to shave those Yeti legs of yours. Get over it already."
Instantly one of the officers present chimes in...
Hey!!! Cool it! Cool it right NOW! Now everybody, EVERYBODY shut up! Now I want a straight up response and no bull from somebody here. No nonsense. Let's get to the bottom of this before I run ALL of you down town. So who's it gonna be? Anybody wanna stop being an ass and try to do that?
Before anyone could even try to offer, Miss Robinson steps forward to speak. He holds his hand up as if to halt her steps as he responds before turning back to the men lined up against the police car...
NOT you Miss Robinson. No. Please stay in your yard ma'am. Go braid that hair on your legs or something. Just...Stay out of this.
He scans the people, thinking to himself just who might at least try to tell the truth. He stops his eyesights on Jacob, pointing to him with his night stick as he replies...
You there. Yea you with half a damn pizza on your face. Tell me what happened. And NO nonsense because my partner and I are running out of patience as it is already.
|
|
|
|
Post by dj on Dec 10, 2007 19:45:57 GMT -5
Dj wakes up to find himself in handcuffs. What the fuck did he do you ask? Not a damn thing at all. Hell, he didnt even live at this house...He only came to get his credit card, but instead got drunk at passed out.What the hell did I do this time. You there...credit card thief....what the hell did ya'll do to get me put back in cuffs?He looks over at the 'Man'...Dont I know you?
Anyway...Officer..I dont know what these fools here did to diserve this...but I think that crazy lookin black man over there done it....What ever IT is...he done it. I know he did. I was asleep, but he done it....Thats mah story and Im sticking to it....Whats your name sir?Who me?No shit sherlock...Yea you. What....Is....Your....Name???Jin Remmy....   Well Mr. Remmy, keep that trap of yours shut...aint no one asked you any questions...Kiss mah assWhat did you say?I said that mexican wants in yer ass....That was the end of that conversation. THe officer picks DJ up, and tosses his half drunken ass into the back of the police car. For what reason...being a smart ass. If he'da just kept taht mouth shut..... BUT IT WASN'T ME!! He yelled from inside the cop car. The cop just ignored it...and turned back to Jacob.Now sir...where were we? Oh, you were just about to tell me what happened here. I suggest making it short and sweet...or your gonna end up like that fool in the car. |
|
Jacob Cruise
GCW Titan
Yes, I am Jacob Cruise. But you may just call me Gaaaawd!
Posts: 149
|
Post by Jacob Cruise on Dec 11, 2007 0:41:45 GMT -5
You see officer...What had happened was..........Woah...woah, wait a second....this is cuz I'm white, ain't it? What? just because I'm the color of your mom and pap's hair means I can't be the bad guy? Huh? What, Nando's opinion don't matter because he's mexican?....*cough* Who might be here illegally, check that shit *uncough* or Cam...Because he's....um....Well.....yeah.....I'm wanting to say...um.....Asian? Nah, dude drives to good for that....um, Samoan? Yeah, that works....We'll roll with that for a minute....What, ya'll don't trust the word of a hard working Samoan? Thats disgraceful for real....
Cruise don't even dare look over to Kincaid at the moment. He figured it best to just keep his eyes on Mr.Officer for the moment. Watch his movements. Heh, never know when dude might pull out is nightstick and try to 'swat a bee away from The Man'. Only to connect with the side of dudes face like ten times....
Listen here Mr.....What was your name again boy?
Mr.Jablowme.....Haywood....Jablowme...
Ok, listen here Mr.Haywood Jablowme...
Psht...Not on yer life homo...I'd rather go to jail then take that kind of bargain....
And just like that, Cruise found himself in the back of a squad car as well.
I plead the fifth!!!! |
|
|
|
Post by theman on Dec 12, 2007 19:10:02 GMT -5
[glow=purple,2,300]BULLSHIT THAT IS WHAT ALL THIS IS.[/glow]
Watch your mouth Mr.
[glow=purple,2,300]Nah man, don't YOU BE TELLING THE MAN TO WATCH HIS MOUTH. THE MAN is A DANGEROUS MAN, so watch your ass.[/glow]
What is that suppose to mean?
Reach into The Mans right hand pocket.
The officer reaches into Mans pocket and pulls out a badge, a NYPD badge.
[glow=purple,2,300]You see that? That means THE MAN WILL KNOCK YOUR PUNK ASS DOWN.[/glow]
Man laughs.
Real funny man real funny, but I REALLY need to know what in THE HELL happened here. And how the hell did you get a hold of this?
You hear a door open and the officer imidiently turns and points at the house.
GET YOUR SCALY WRINKLED ASS BACK IN THAT HOUSE MISS ROBINSON.
She goes back inside the house.
So I need ANSWERERS or ELSE I WILL have to ARREST the BOTH of you and take you guys down to the station.
[glow=purple,2,300]Thats what she said last night.[/glow]
Excuse me Mr? Do you have something else to say.
Man laughs.
[glow=purple,2,300]I sure do, thats what that pretty wife of yours said last night when we FUCKED SO HARD.........[/glow]
WATCH IT MR.
[glow=purple,2,300]AND THEN SHE ARRESTED ME AND TOOK MEEEEEEE TO THE STATION AND BACK. HAHA MANNNNNNN WAS IT..............[/glow]
Man gets punched by the officer and thrown into the police car with Jacob. Man continues to laugh his ass off while the cop speaks to Kincaid.
SON OF A BITCH..........
Officer looks at Cameron.
IN DETAIL WHAT IN THE FUCK HAPPENED?
|
|
. But anyway, he looked in the mirror after emptying the contents of the bottle, and all he could see was two of himself. He then stumbled out of the door, and began to make his way down the hall, really just sliding down the wall to keep his balance.
