Someone Who Actually Wrestles For A Change? (O2A)

[Jayceon Williams]

Lights went out in the arena. Then turned back on in multiple colors when the some of "Smash Sumthin'" hits the PA system. Out comes Remmy onto stage. No dancing? Not tonight folks. The fans cheers but instantly notice he's not his usual self. Not like they could blame him. Two losses on account of being low blowed, he's got a right to be angry. He simply just walked to the ring. Around to the side. Up the steel steps. Onto the apron. Climbed into the ring. Then once Remmy was in the ring, he reached around behind himself. Grabbing a microphone that was sticking out of his back pocket. He motions his hand across his neck and lifts the microphone to his lips before his music stops...

"Alright, alright, alright... Cut my damn music. Cut it."

He lowered the microphone. His music cut instantly. He wasn't out here to play no games or be Mr. Happy tonight. Tonight was about proving himself. Why? Well, facing a nigga who can't win a match by fighting him like a man wasn't working. He could call him out again. But hell... He'd probably lose again due to repeated punches to his family jewels. There's no point. Doesn't seem like people give a damn about that in this business. He raised the microphone and began to speak again...

"Okay. I know, I know. Niggas probably laughing in the back. "Remmy lost to a punch in the nuts! Hahahahahahaha!" Right? Am I right? Pfft... Bullshit. I tell ya. Anthony Ramirez? No respect. He gets no points in my book. All that nigga knows how to do is reach for my nuts. And watch. He's going to get rewarded for it. Probably a party was thrown. And for what? Because he reached for my sac multiple times? Is that what passes for greatness these days? Hitting someone in their family jewels in order to gain a victory? Is that what you over yonder seriously consider to be a star in this business? Pfft.. You get no respect, no points, nadda... Not a damn thing. Hope yer happy with yerself Ramirez. You only proved how little skill you have in this business. Congratulations. You suck. Anyways... I'm done with him. Tired of his punk ass. Can't do nothing but feel on my nuts. I've heard of dickriders in this business... But goddamn... Now... onto tonight.... LockUp!... Let's see if I can actually find someone who's worthy of being in this business. Someone who actually wrestles and has some kind of ability in the ring. Not someone who can't even win a match without striking someone in their nuts. So let's see... Anyone... Anyone at all in the locker room... Come out... Come out where ever you are... Open challenge nyukkas... Let's see who actually wrestles in this business... I don't see anyone else giving a damn about the blatant supposed "illegal" moves being done in my matches recently... Tried to get something done about it by one of the CEOs but hell... Guess even CEOs could give a fuck less about the rules in this sport... Fuck it... LockUp!.... Get some!"

He lowered the microphone from his lips. Awaiting an answer from anyone at all to his open challenge.

[jenkins]

Suddenly the theme of some main eventer starts hitting the scene, the fans roar, someone important came for the challenge of the rightfully pissed off Jin Remmy. Everyone thought. Wrestling at its finest everyone hoped.

Unfortunately....

The theme morphs into The Jenkins' non-inspired and looped themesong, as all the fans boo in result. Guess that two pathetical losses, deserve two pathetical tag teams... But that's not the worst, the worst is that both of them have a mic

Get your cajones out of the icebag, and stick a target on them so I can know where to hit ya!

The C.E.O's don't give a damn about you! Haha and it isn't easy to see why, that hair, that hygiene, but what can we expect from guys to come from the hood and try to compare themeselves to the bestest tag team in GCW history, ourselves...

The crowd boos, but it isn't a boo of "wow how great this heels are" it's more a boo of "Who hired these?"

But we ain't here to talk you down, Jolly Green Ali G. We are here because our particular Tinker Bell told us that you and your cajones... Or what's left of them issued a challenge, heh for being a guy who claims to have been left eggless in the ring, you sure have a lot of guts to issue a challenge. Well we accept your challenge. But because we wanna make this fair.... Lester pull a straw

The Jenkins take two straws and Lester pulls one, Jasper pulls another one... Both are the shortest....

Best of three tries...

Jasper and Lester pull another one, again it's the shortest....

Damn! This stupid game of hell!!! This sucks!!!

Jasper and Lester again pull the straws and again they draw

Enough of games! Since you spoke first Jasper you'll be the one taking on Jin Remmy, and I will be the one in your corner!

Deal! And you Jin, get ready a keg filled with Ice, because tonight I am gonna hit you so hard in the balls you are gonna have 3 Adam's Apple, I am gonna hit you so hard you'll be a Soprano chip munk!

Jasper goes down the ramp and gets into the ring with Jin Remmy

Not even if you wear Jerry Rice's triple cover it's gonna save you punk, just one punch right down the waist and I gotcha, thanks for revealing to me and to everyone your weak point!

Jasper scratches his dirty fro hair as he waits for an answer.

[Jayceon Williams]

"Y'all niggas are ghey... "

Why did he get stuck with the two lamest bastards in this company? Ugh... These dudes are worse than Anthony Ramirez. Remmy pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. Shaking his head slowly. Fuck it. Atleast it's someone. Not everyone is a gutless bastard it seems. But here come the lame low blow jokes. He lowered his hand. Opened his eyes. Looked at the two lame fucks. Raised the microphone. Time to respond...

"So... When did GCW start hiring the mentally handicap? I knew GCW was seriously searching for talent to pump their roster but... What the hell? They hired Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum? I swear... What the hell is going through them wimmenz heads...? Alright. You niggas got jokes. Fine. Shit was to be expected. Take what's been going on with me recently and throw it in my face. Sure. But... I already mentioned that before you bastards came out... Making any attempt to attack that completely null and void. You think it hurts my feelings? You think I'm mad that you wanna talk about me getting cheated by the lame ass so-called "talent" over in MayheM? Fine by me. Talk it up. Laugh it up. You ain't making anyone mad here. I don't even feel bad about my losses. I was cheated. I was loss due to unfair circumstances. Big fuggin' whoop. But let's see what we got here... Lame looking fucks... With lamer insults... Just got off the short bus and slipped into some singlets... Had Candice and Amanda tie yer boots for ya... And sent you out here to take care of me... Well... I gotta say boys... Shit ain't looking too good for ya if they sent you to the slaughterhouse this early... You niggas think you can wrestle? Fine by me. Bring it bitches. Don't give a fuck if one of you... Or the both of you are there. You're gonna see what happens when you get a nigga like Jin Remmy mad."

[Jean Bordeux]

All of the sudden It's Raining Men hits over the arena and the fans go nuts for some reason as Jean makes his way onto the stage and smiles as he taunts. Jean makes his way down the ramp and into the ring and bypasses Jin and the Jenkins. Jean speaks.

[glow=green,2,300]Vell vell it avvears zhat ve gots 3 v erid veeps here in ze ving. I vas trayings tooz keeps ups vith vhat vas goings ons, vut it ziz zears imvossible tooz keeps upz vith since yooz Vemmy........... [/glow]

Jean points at Jin.

[glow=green,2,300]talk in suchs a non Zenglish zanguage. [/glow]

Jean points at The Jenkins.

[glow=green,2,300]Yooz guys have zhat zittles zap zap vouth to ze points vhere NO VONES can understands yoozies.[/glow]

Jean sniffs.

[glow=green,2,300]Vhat is zhat svell?[/glow]

Everyone looks around like WHAT THE DEUCE?

[glow=green,2,300]Somezings zvelles very veird mon amis.[/glow]

Jean gets closer to The Jenkins as he finally figures out what he smells.

[glow=green,2,300]OH MYS GODS ZENKINS...........yooz vreath svells zike zhat zast Ass zhat I zicked. OH MYS GODS ZISTERINE FELLAS ZISSSSTERINESSSSSSS. Don'ts yooz guys ever vrush yur zeeth? Iz doos, every zingle vonrings ands nightsies. EWWWWWWW ZEAR LORDS ITS SVELLS.[/glow]

Jean covers his nose as he runs away from The Jenkins. The crowd and Jin just laugh there ass off.

[glow=green,2,300]Soos fromz vhat I noez, one of yooz has as vatch vith Zin Vemmys? Now vich vone of yooz iz zhat? Zesters? or Vaspers? Eithers vays, I vill take on ze ozer vones. Do yoos excepts?[/glow]

Jean waits for a response.

[jenkins]

Lester gathers his brother as they both stare at Jin and Jean, they take a deep look and then start laughing, Lester speaks first

Look Jin, if you were looking for some cajones replacement, why in the hell you picked up this guy?!

Yeah you guy, in what lisp are you talking? Seems to me that someone doesn't spit nor swallow after his "Rentaz-de-vozus"... "Rendsavouis"... Meetings! But he just likes to have it on the mouth, so he can chuckle this Carnival fairy accent!

And we ain't up for Carnival fairies like you!!! Those so-called "kings of fashion" because they love men, have insulted us! But haha they are so ridicolous... Fans those gays called us losers.... Me and Jasper losers?! That's funny isn't it?

the crowd starts chanting "Losers!" towards The Jenkins

Ha ha ha, very funny, what can we expect of a crowd who laughs their ass off at the Queer As Folk jokes of this French Fairy? Nothing but a bunch of fairies like him!

And Jin Remmy you are no exception you come here with your ebonics but in the end you team up with the white man... White gay man! Isn't that just sad? We can even rap better than you do, Jasper gimme a beat!

Jasper starts beating as Lester prepares to rap, thousands of fans try to run away, but all exits are blocked...

Yo, yo, yo
It's the J to the A to the S
to the P to the E to the R
Since my young days doing air guitar
there is one thing I have disliked with all my heart
Is those guys who have more pink than a sugar frosted Pop-Tart

And while we are here with Remmy
Who has less balls of those who won a Grammy
He gets help from a gay, no that's not funny
A better opponent for us would be his granny

Orale! Viva la "Pasa!"

Jasper poses as he and Jasper laugh at their opponents while they wait for an answer

[Jayceon Williams]

Remmy raised an eyebrow. Goddamn. The ghey nyukka showed up. What the hell does he look like? Booker T? It's these damned dreads. ;D Dreads must attract the gheys. Goddamn. Oh well. Fuck it. Not that he had anything against him, but why he here? Sounds like he's looking for a challenge. But with the Jenkins dudes? Oh well. Let's keep it rolling. He had one of them fools. Guess the ghey nyukka can have the other one. Remmy raised the microphone...

"Whoa, whoa, whoa... Now I ain't need no help from anybody. Guess memory lapses are a bitch though these days. Standing there with drool on yer lip as you space out. I was speaking to you two. Y'all decided to take forever in responding. Then this nyukka Jean shows up before you guys even answered. I need help? Nah. Not me. Never that. If you were listening at all... The nyukka Jean said he wanted you Lester. Seems he's taken a liking to you. Normally, I don't condone such acts but... I guess the mentally handicapped need love too I suppose. So.. Looks like you got yerself a date tonight Lester. But... This is my time now. So accept his challenge and let the ghey nyukka be on his merry way. This right here... As you made it clear... Is between myself and Jasper..."

He paused for a moment. Smirk crossing his face. These lame fucks, I tell ya.

"Lame ass nyukka with a lame ass rap. Coming off talking about the way I speak... Like we ain't heard the ol' Hooked On Phonics jokes before in this business. Sad really. Recycled insults that don't ever seem to go away. Oh well. Bore the fans with another weak excuse at an attempt to assault me verbally. Go ahead. Talk about my nuts. Talk about me being hit in them. Go ahead. Say something about the way I speak nyukka. Come on. Say something. Give us some time to have a bathroom break. I'm sure there's some folks who need to refill their popcorn and sodas. Do another long rant about how you "uber-cool" dudes are the greatest thing since sliced bread....

I'm waiting..."

He laughed to himself. Begging for a challenge from these Jenkins fools to insult him. He honestly could give a fuck less what they had to say. But hell... Dee dee Dee ass nyukkas need time to shine too I guess. Let's see what they have to say...

[jenkins]

The Jenkins rise their eyebrows attempting to be sarcastic

'Scuse me, Remmy. But do you even understood what this french fifi said?

Not even you Jin Remmy after having smoked all Colombia could stand what this poodle said! But I understood something, this stinko from West Hollywood asked if a glorious Jenkins was free for a match and Jean Bathturd you are lucky today, very lucky today. Because myself "The Yellow Rose from Plymouth" Lester Jenkins currently has no match! So Ghey, wait for me, I am gonna get a tampoon in my ass, so you cannot go with your tendences on me!

And Remmy say whatever you want, but without low blows, I can defeat your sorry skinny little ass. One snapmare, lock up, and you are tapping in seconds!

So before I kill.... your career wanna say some last words to this fans who have had to stand all your foolishness??

Any last wishes Ghey's Anatomy?

The Jenkins then get ready for action..

[Jayceon Williams]

These nyukkas serious? Kill his career? Pfft. Don't make Remmy laugh. These fools are not even on his level. They want to kill a career? Then it's their funeral.

"Right... Right... Kill my career.... Right... You dudes are funny. You are a funny couple of dudes. Keep telling yer little jokes. Only going to make the ass kicking of a Jenkins boy be just that much worse. Cut the small talk. Just bring yer lame ass to the ring and we'll see what happens."

Remmy dropped the microphone on the mat. He was ready to whoop a nyukka's ass.

[Jean Bordeux]

[glow=green,2,300]VO vo vo vo VOOOOOOOOO, QUITES VIS ZITH HORRIBLE VUBBISH OF VUSIC YOOZ ZINGS. Noes needs to stars fightinz heres mon amis. Nows how avouts I zing vy own zong.......hehe..........[/glow]

Jean does a AHEM.

[glow=green,2,300] I vant mores GHEY VORN........
Vith voth Zenkins Vrothers vlowing eachs ozers ZORN............
Iz don'ts cares who yooz ares........
Camerons Kincaids gettings fooks up ze arse.....
Vut I'm zrivings in Pornystars Cars.........
Ve and Viles gettings it one in ze Cars.........
Iz don'ts knows vhat ze say anyvays........
Ze Familias gettings it ons in a 3 vays.......
Jean needs somez vig zick.......
Jin Vemmy how much fur yours zick?.........
I vant mores GHEY VORN.........
SO VY VANT VE ALL GETS......ITS..........ONZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.............................Vhile Zaked in a Vool?
[/glow]

Jin and The Jenkins look disgusted and about to throw up as Jean speaks for the busting out laughing crowd.

[glow=green,2,300]Iz zee zhat yooz are sveechzess Zin and Zenkins? Vy so? Yooz don'ts zike vy singypoos? GOES VUCK YURSELVES ZHEN.[/glow]

Jean fixes his sunglasses as the crowd laughs.

[glow=green,2,300]Vait.....zhat vould ve quits entertainings hehe.[/glow]

Jean and the crowd laugh.

[glow=green,2,300]Zo zid I shuts yuuz vikering vack and fourths mon amis? Goodys........[/glow]

Jean looks at the crowd.

[glow=green,2,300]Zhat iz a goods vlace to shops vy ze vays.[/glow]

Jean pauses for the laughing crowd.

[glow=green,2,300]So can vees all zalk avouts Vestling nows? I gots an zanning avointvent in zirty vinutes.....and a vax zob toos hehe.[/glow]

Jean laughs as he waits for a response.

[jenkins]

The Jenkins start to get angry at Jean making them the bottom of their jokes...

Look me in the eye you cheap ass nyukka or whatever the hell you ebonic-infested, mop-haired, cotton-picking, jackass want to call yourself. Me and my brother here came for a fight, and you two either with your pranciness or with your nyukaness have provoked us to not only wish to kick your lard asses but to

End your stinkin' career once and for all!!! Think it Jasper, the boost it would give us, it would convince Miss Wallace to make us Co-World Champs, think in the boost and the rise she'd give us, and most importantly think in the girls we would get...

I NEED GIRLS!!!!

The Jenkins then chuckle like perverts as they look at Remmy and Jean

So I take on the ebonic moronic Remmy and you Lester you take on the queery fairy from the Bowery, Jean Redux or Jean Redskin or whatever this foam-filled pimpled cretin's surname is...

And Jean, get on my ass and there won't be enough trees in the Amazons to make the paper of what my sue agaisnt you will be! Understood?!?